Life of Joy
Friday, December 26, 2008
OK, So What's in a # Anyway?
It's the funniest thing. 17 months ago I could not have even told you what a CA 125 test was. Now, it seems this little number has the power to some months make me feel like I'm walking on air, and other months not-so-much. My latest test at 19 is the highest I've had in over a year. I have to wait four weeks to do another monthly test and at the point a decision will be made as to whether there is an upward trend. I have to keep reminding myself that I just had a clear CT scan, I feel fine, and in the bigger scheme this is not a huge change. Still.... the mind has the ability to take over and become obsessive at times. I have to remind myself that I am not going to let this number take over me or my mind. This past month I've had a skin cancer body scan, a mammogram, and a meeting with my gynocologist/oncologist. Everything was good, so what's with this pesky number. I guess I'll have to wait until next month to find out. In the mean time I plan to devote some time to my art work, scrapbooking, organizing photos etc. ---the most therapeutic activities known to me. Onward.
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7 comments:
Onward, b/c what is the alternative? *hugs* I know a bit about obsessing, don't we all...of course I have no real idea what it is like for you, as a matter of life vs. death...but I can only imagine it must be much worse than the mini-obsessing I have done in my life, which is bad enough. We know it's not going to change anything to obsess, we know it's not healthy, but the mind does its own thing.
I'll be thinking of you this month, and will include plenty of non-obsessive vibes your way! So onward indeed, and may you be creative and productive and have some fun...you deserve it my friend. *hugs* again.
Hey woman, you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. I pray this is a little glitch, I pray for your strength, and I thank God, that you are a wonderful friend in my life. Please keep us posted, and let the production begin...............
Love you
Ugh. That stupid number. Sometimes ignorance is bliss!
Try your best to put it out of your mind, and keep yourself busy. Your CT scan is clear, you feel good - those are the most important things to focus on.
I'll be thinking of you and also sending good vibes your way! :)
I'm thinking of you Joellyn.
Joellyn, know that you have been and will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. I know how all these tests and numbers can mess with your mind. Try to take it one day at a time. Hugs! --Karla
I know it will be hard, but try not to dwell on the numbers. Just keep thinking of the CT scan and how good you've been feeling. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. See you in Feb..seems that I remember that you won't be at the crop on Friday.
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